Archive for the ‘Why Baby Jesus’ Category

BEWARE Of Women Who Do NOT Swallow…They Are The Devil & Will Sue You For Child Support!!!!

March 23, 2011 1 comment

Now as a firm believer of the “SPITTERS ARE QUITTERS”  movement I’ve always felt that Monica Lewinsky should have done some jail time for that BULLSHAT she pulled on my boy Clinton.    BUT, hey who am I to judge, however because she got away with doing that foolishness now we have women thinking its acceptable to play around with semen.  Look men if a woman is blowing you and you bust in her mouth you look her dead in the eye and make sure she swallows…if she can’t you walk her azz to the bathroom and watch her spit that sh*t in the toilet!  Women let’s be real if you can swallow phlegm, buckleys (cough syrup), patron, etc you can swallow some damn semen so cut the BS out already!   Anywho, it looks like this woman Dr. Sharon Irons tried to take the shine from Monica Lewinsky…apparently this woman had oral sex with a man and instead of being a trooper and swallowing she found a way to impregnate herself with it!!!!  Details below:

“So, a man sued his ex-girlfriend for fraud and emotional distress after she secured a court order demanding he pay child support for their two year-old daughter. The reason? This woman saved his semen after performing oral sex and secretly impregnated herself. No, this is not a new plotline of absurd television show One Tree Hill but actual events that formed the basis of a 2005 legal battle in Illinois.

Although this case is six years old and garnered some media attention at the time, we recently came across it on Professor Jonathan Turley’s blog and couldn’t resist an opportunity to discuss it.

But before we get to the legal issues presented in this case, namely how a man can be ordered to support a child when his sperm was used without his knowledge, the soap opera-esque facts surrounding this situation deserve to be explained in greater detail.  Trust us.

It all began when Dr. Sharon Irons (an internist) and Dr. Richard Phillips (a family practitioner) began dating in January 1999. Dr. Irons led Dr. Phillips to believe she was divorced and within a few months, they became engaged. According to Dr. Phillips, the two discussed the possibility of having children and he made clear his intentions: that he did not want children until after they were married and any pre-marital sex would require the use of condoms. Throughout the course of their relationship, they engaged in only three instances of oral sex: they never went “all the way.”

On one of these intimate occasions, Dr. Irons did something rather remarkable: After fellating Dr. Phillips, she held his semen in her mouth (where it was suitable to sustain viability) and then inseminated herself with it. She did not inform Dr. Phillips of her actions.

Dr. Irons also never informed her boyfriend that she was, in fact, still married. Five months into their relationship, she confessed to Dr. Phillips that she was not divorced and he decided to end their relationship.

Fast-forward to November 2000, when, surprise! Dr. Irons slapped her surely stunned ex-boyfriend with court papers to establish paternity and child support for “their” daughter.

Extraordinary they are, indeed. And while Dr. Irons’ act of stashing semen away definitely made for attention-grabbing headlines, the media focused more on the sexy- slash-crazy angle and less on the actual law. We decided to explore the legal claims advanced by the parties and the reasoning behind Dr. Phillips seemingly unjust obligation to support a child whose existence was beyond the realm of expectation.

In his suit, Dr. Phillips alleged the unauthorized use of his semen constituted actionable claims of fraudulent misconception, conversion and intentional infliction of emotional distress. A lower court dismissed these grievances, and he appealed.

The Appellate Court of Illinois found that a fraudulent misconception claim was only available for “economic” wrongs, and so dismissed this claim. (Dr. Phillips was suing for physical and emotional harms he alleged that he’d suffered as a result of Dr. Irons’ actions).

The court next turned its attention to the conversion claim. Conversion is “an unauthorized act that deprives a person of his property permanently or for an indefinite period of time.” The arguments on both sides of the conversion claim are worth noting.

Dr. Phillips argued that his ex-fiancé took his property, his sperm, without his permission to conceive a child. Dr. Irons countered by asserting the sperm was a gift: Dr. Phillips delivered it to her with the intention that she keep it because if he really wanted to retain his semen, he would have put on a condom and “kept its contents”.

The court agreed with Dr. Irons: Dr. Phillips cannot claim he was deprived of his property because he did not intend that the semen be returned.”  source

*HARD BLANK STARE*… Y’all know damn well what my first and only question is going to be!!!! WHO IN BABY JESUS NAME DID SHE IMPREGNATE HERSELF!!! JUST HOW! The next thing I need to bring up is … since when is semen considered a got damn gift?  This woman had the nerve to tell the courts the sperm was a gift that was delivered to her with the intention to keep it, and if he didn’t want her to have it he should have kept it!!! *lawd baby jesus take me away*…this is some real shat right here! That is some funny shat can you imagine giving your man some buffers and then he busts in your mouth and says “Happy Birthday baby…I gave you the gift of sperm”…LMFAO that is some sh*t I would do….BUT look this isn’t about me! Lets get serious here though!! I think its sad what this woman did…how can you use sperm to impregnate yourself then have the nerve to press charges for child support.  I mean if you were woman enough to be deceitful and have the child by yourself then raise that sh*t by yourself.  But it looks like Dr. Richard Phillips tried to sue to stop the child support since Dr. Ions was shady about the entire conception…but sadly it looks like he doesn’t have a case!!

“The court stated that Dr. Irons’ conduct in deceitfully engaging in oral sex to procure the sperm necessary to impregnate herself would, according to any reasonable person, be considered “extreme and outrageous” conduct (Ed. Note: well, duh).  Considering the nature of Dr. Irons’ actions and Dr. Phillips’ clear expression of not wanting a child out-of-wedlock, the second element of IIED was met. For the actual distress, Dr. Phillips claimed a whole slew of anguish including nausea, loss of appetite, interference with his profession, insomnia and more, which was enough to keep the case alive.

The final decision or current status of the case is unavailable which means that the case is still being litigated or the parties settled.

Regardless, what confused us most about the case was that the child support obligation on behalf of Dr. Phillips was not contested. How could a father be forced to pay child support if the conception of the child was beyond (way, way beyond) a reasonable person’s expectation?  The court itself stated that the mother’s actions were “extreme and outrageous”, after all.

The answer? Public policy. In a note for the Drake University Law Review, A Man’s Right to Choose: Searching for Remedies in the Face of Unplanned Fatherhood, author Adrienne D. Gross explained the general policy in law of looking out for a child’s best interest in both child support and paternity statutes. Undisputedly, a child’s best interest is to have the financial support of both biological parents, regardless of their marital status, and according to Ms. Gross, “the child should not suffer from a parent’s indiscretion concerning the events leading to conception.”

Basically, if you father a child and the paternity is established, you are on the hook for child support payments. (A father can sue for IIED, if the mother’s actions in the conception meet the requisite level of crazy, but there is no guarantee he will win.)”  source

I feel bad for Dr. Phillips and feel like she should have been let off with this case…lets be for real it’s not like there were having sex and she lied about being on birth control or something … she buffed him off and then used the sperm to impregnate herself.  I mean if that isn’t fraud or something then got damnit I don’t know what it!!! Damn this poor man is gonna be traumatized and may  never want to get buffed off again…if I was him I would have planted some drugs in Dr. Iron’s home then called the cops on her azz!


New Underwear That Keeps Your Va-Jay-Jay Cool!!!! *side-eye*

March 18, 2011 Leave a comment

Ok so I’m not a big fan of underwear so I’m not sure I’ll be able to test this out for you…Second, why do you need your va-jay-jay to be cool?  Are these underwear for women with like STD’s or Yeast Infections.   Lets be for real if you want to keep your va-jay-jay cooler just do like me and wear nothing or better yet some crotchless panties…there is nothing like the fresh breeze!!  I don’t know man I just feel like there is something suspect about these underwear!

“Lady parts can sometimes be way complicated. I mean, doesn’t your vagina sometimes overheat? It’s not like your body naturally regulates its temperature or anything. But thankfully, Jockey has created cooling underwear, which soothes your burning firecrotch with state-of-the-art technology from NASA!. Says the company, “The Outlast® temperature regulating technology behind Jockey® staycool underwear helps your skin feel up to 3° cooler.” And we’re sure it really works. After all, it was initially developed by NASA scientists to “help balance temperature fluctuations in space.” Space! (Your vagina is just like space.)”  source

CTFU at them saying burning firecrotch *baby jesus take me away*…see I told y’all these panties are for women whose va-jay-jay is not working correctly! SMFH!  Instead of buying these damn panties just go to the damn doctor!

In *I Can’t Be Weave It* News: Store Owner Shot & Killed Over 6 Bags Of Hair! *blank Stare*

March 17, 2011 Leave a comment

I tell you boy this recession is NO JOKE….no matter how broke a b*tch is she gonna make sure she is gonna do whatever she has to keep that weave tight.   SMFH! I blame that Chris Rock documentary “Good Hair” on this crime!  He got b*tches out here trying to rob and kill for those $1000 weaves LMFAO! The weave game is worst than the drug game LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Lawd baby jesus take me away!

“The owner of Sunrise Beauty Supply was shot and killed during an apparent robbery late Tuesday morning.  A witness who saw the aftermath from inside a nearby shoe store told police the suspect ran out of Sunrise carrying six bags of hair.

That witness told FOX 2 the suspect, a teenage or twenty something black male in sweat pants, a coat and do-rag, jumped in a four-door, silver Focus being driven by a black female.  They both then sped away.”   source

Now this is just some sad sh*t right here some b*tch probably hit up her man to get her hair done and he was like “h*e these times are hard if you my ride or die b*tch you gonna rob this hair supply store with me to make sure your hair get done”…I can see it now the female was probably like “yo make sure you get that remy hair” LMFAO!

Nine-Year-Old Refuses To Drive With Drunken Mother…Reaches Out To Bank Employee For Help!!!

February 24, 2011 Leave a comment

I swear some people should just not be allowed to have kids.  Its sad when your children know better than you do!  This bastard was willing to endanger herself and her child by driving drunk.   Now you guys know I’m not a fan of drinking and driving because you are at risk for spilling your drink but when you are drinking and driving and you have your child with you then you deserved to get punched in your throat.  If this woman somehow harmed her child because she was drunk driving I bet you she would have been all over the place boo hoo’ing!  SMFH!  Anywho, I had to applaud this young girl she was not only looking out for herself but for her mother!  And why the hell was the mother dead drunk in the middle of the day anyway…she couldn’t wait until she finished running her errands to go home and get wasted??

“A nine-year-old girl passed a note to bank staff telling them her mother was drunk in a desperate attempt to stop her from getting behind the wheel to drive them home, police said.

Latanya Evans, 49, had gone into the Bank of America branch in Southfield, Detroit, when her daughter passed the note to a cashier.

When the girl refused to get into her mother’s car, Evans sped off leaving her stranded, according to police.  Evans was arrested for drunk driving and having a suspended licence.

Police praised the little girl’s quick thinking.  Southfield Police Lieutenant Nick Loussia told The Detroit News: ‘The girl was very smart and did the right thing.

‘She tried to get her mother help, and she refused to get back in the car with her mom because she had been drinking.’

He explained that when Evans was stopped not far from the bank police believed she was drunk.  ‘Officers said she was having trouble getting out of the car and her speech was slurred, her eyes glassy and she smelled of alcohol.

‘She subsequently failed field sobriety tests, including a preliminary breath test, and was placed under arrest.”  Source

GOT DAMN…what was she drinking? Patron?  It must have been something real good for her to be slurring and falling all over the damn place!  Anywho…i’m just happy the police got her azz before she ending up crashing into some sh*t and killing herself and everyone else.  I know the 9-year-old is probably sitting back saying “good for your old drunken azz … that’s what you get for trying to endanger me“…

Woman Who Died During Botched Butt Surgery, Was Acting Being Watched By The FEDS For Drug Trafficking…

February 14, 2011 Leave a comment

DEZAMN talk about bashing someone when they are down!  TSK TSK!  I’m still amazed at how many of these women are risking their lives just to get that perfect body.  I can’t lie if I had some money I would be getting some new breast and a booty as well but all these horror stories are scaring the crap out of me…Anywho it looks like the 20-year-old Claudia Aderotimi who came to America to get her butt enhanced was actually trafficking drugs as well.  Now, you mean to tell me if you are trafficking drugs from one country to another they couldn’t pay you a decent amount to get your sh*t down in a hospital! GEESH!  Well she may be dead but she may be smiling in her grave since she won’t be able to get caught by the FEDS lmfao!

“The British woman who died following a botched buttock-enhancement procedure was reportedly being watched by federal agents who suspected she may have been bringing drugs into the country.

Claudia Aderotimi, a 20-year-old aspiring hip-hop vixen, had been red-flagged by the Immigrations and Customs Enforcement agency (ICE) and was under surveillance when she checked into a budget hotel in Philadelphia earlier this month to receive injections to fatten her rear, the U.K.’s Daily Mail reported.

She had landed on the ICE’s radar after making a trip to the U.S. from London in November for a similar back-room procedure.

Agents were monitoring Aderotimi’s recent trip after receiving a tip that she, and the three women with her, were allegedly involved in illegal drug activity at the Hampton Inn, according to the Mail.” source

This is a damn shame but I need to know what woman in her right mind will say to herself…I’m going to go to a crappy motel room to get me some butt injections.  Wouldn’t you sit and say to yourself  “there has to be a safer way”!  She should have just ordered some booty poppers and called that sh*t a day! SMFH!

In *Hip Hop Is DEAD* News: There’s A New Gangsta Rapper & He Has NO HANDS!

February 8, 2011 Leave a comment

*cue my Wacka Flocka song*…..And Imma throw this money while you do it with no hands! OWWWWWW… No all jokes aside this is just down right sad!  A friend of mine tagged me in this video and it took me forever to watch it and now I’m mad at myself for not watching it sooner so I could have posted it for you guys sooner. 

BLACK PEOPLE WE MUST DO BETTER!!! I”m all for disabled people trying to find a place in the world but some things you just need to accept you can never do.  I had to sit back and watch this video THREE times because I just could not believe what I was watching…

I can’t figure out if I’m more upset at the fact that he is using his cell phone with his foot (that he did not bother to put lotion on by the way) or the fact that he is asking the person on the other line if they got his money!  AND then he had the nerve to say they are going to chase this dough (I’m going to let that one marinate for y’all)…

*super hard blank stare*…

GOT DAMNIT! Immigration Authorities Done Got A Hold Of Chipotle’s Workers…

February 8, 2011 1 comment

source: NYDaily News

WHO THE F*CK IS GONNA MAKE THOSE SLAMMING STEAK BURRITO BOWLS NOW!!! WHO??  This is crazy I always knew the food at chipotle was too damn good for American workers to be making that shat.  In addition to the food being good as hell you could tell they didn’t know a sip of english because you would have to point to the toppings that you wanted on your burritos or taco because they couldn’t understand what you were saying.   I’m telling you guys right now any how immigration ships Chipotle workers back to Mexico that food chain will be f*cked…DO YOU HEAR ME?  F*CKED!

“Workers at Chipotle restaurants across the country might be making a run for the border soon.

The Mexican food chain, which serves gut-busting burritos, tacos and tortilla-less burrito bowls in nearly 1,100 locations across the U.S., fired hundreds of workers in Minnesota recently amid a probe by immigration authorities.

The workers were let go after an audit by the U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement Agency (ICE) revealed that workers at some of the 50 restaurants across the state had turned in phony-looking I-9 forms, which verify that a worker is eligible to work in the U.S.

The probe is widening to Washington, D.C. and Virginia, and the company may have to boot workers from some of the 60 locations there if investigators find more evidence of I-9 fraud.” 

The ICE’s crackdown is part of President Obama’s immigration policy, which is focusing on employers and conducting audits of companies’ hiring practices.

Chipotle is one of the most prominent companies to be targeted by the Obama administration, as most audits have focused on small employers, according to The Wall Street Journal.”  source

SMFH at the Obama administration messing up the Chipotle flow!  I will DIE if this food chain goes under I don’t live in California so this is the best I can get when it comes to Mexican food.  I know one thing Chipotle corporate offices better get their shat together and figure something the hell out! 

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